The End

After six years of the best television I’ve ever watched LOST is finally over. Like many series finales this one has sparked “vigorous” debate on whether it was good, great, or a total cop out. I, for one, think it was a good ending. A couple more answers would have made it great but for the most part it was a satisfying end to a great show.

On Island – Jack Attack

Jack, now infused with Island Protector magic, begins his plan to kill Evil Locke. He sends Sawyer off to get Desmond “The Weapon” Hume and the rest of his merry band proceeds to the Island’s Golden Cave o’ Magic.

Meanwhile Desmond wakes up in the sprawling palatial estate of Bernard and Rose (and Vincent). They broke their isolationist rules and got him out of the well but now he needs to leave cause it’s 11am and that’s the time Bernard and Rose get it on. But Desmond’s departure is too late! Evil Locke has found him and threatens to painfully kill his rescuers unless he goes with him. Even though Rose says don’t Desmond heads off with him and Ben.

At the same time Sawyer has found the well but found it to be empty. He hustles back to Jack and crew to warn them. It’s cool says Jack then Evil Locke, Desmond, and Ben join them. What hell – lets all go to the magic cave together! Protector Jack is starting to feel a little cocky bringing Evil Locke right where he wants to go.

At the entrance to the magic cave Evil Locke says that only he, Desmond, and Jack should go and that everyone else has to wait. Sure why not listen to the crazy evil smoke guy.

Jack and Evil Locke’s conversation while they lower Desmond down the waterfall is awesome.

“You do realize I’m going to destroy this Island Jack?” says Evil Locke.
“You do realize I’m going to kill the shit out of you Evil Locke?” says Jack.
“Oh really? How?”
“It’s a surprise. Bitch.”

Desmond wades into the crazy electromagnetic pool and pulls out the cork (hey the Island WAS a cork!). The golden water drains away and is replaced by an angry red throbbing. Desmond passes out at the base of the waterfall and the whole Island starts losing its shit.

“Told ya so chump!” Evil Locke mockingly says to Jack. PUNCH says Jack. And Evil Locke bleeds. Then he clocks Jack with a rock and heads off to his boat. Jack lays around for a little bit and then his Island Protector Ninja Skills awaken. What proceeds is, in my mind, one of the most epic events in LOST history – Jack and Evil Locke fight. Jack gets a knife to the gut (guess that wasn’t an appendix scar in the Alternaverse) and a cut to his neck (Alternaverse!) as Evil Locke tries to finish him off. But, after six seasons of being completely useless, Kate blasts Evil Locke with the last shot from her rifle. She could have been a little more clever that “I saved one for you” zinger. How about something like “guess you’ve just been…smoked”? Anyways Evil Locke is down for the count and Protector Jack wastes no time giving him the literal boot. Over the cliff. Seems the body of John Locke is always meant to be flung from high places. One problem solved but there is still the little matter of the self destructing Island. Jack, Ben, and Hurley (didn’t trust the ladders I guess) stay on the Island to save it while Kate and Sawyer head off to Desmond’s old boat to get over to Hydra island and the plane.
Back on Hydra Island Frank (he’s still alive!), Richard, and Miles are working hard on getting said plane flight worthy. I don’t know about you but I’m not sure I’d trust that plane to fly me across the Pacific to safety but I guess when you’re on a dying Island anything will do.

Back at the magic cave Jack’s tenure as Island Protector ends as quickly as it began with a dirty bottle of water shared with Hurley and then he’s headed down the waterfall. Down there he finds Desmond’s passed out body and he hooks him up with the rope so he can be pulled up and then he grabs the big stopper and puts it back in its place. The angry red throbbing leaves and the water once again flows, the Island is saved!

Sawyer and Kate make it to Hydra island and hop in the plane just before takeoff. They second guess themselves when they find out the inflight movie is Gigli.
Jack passes out only to waken on a rock in a stream (that’s where Black Shirt’s body was deposited too!). He stumbles through the bamboo forest to the same place he initially woke up after the crash of 815. As he lays down Vincent the dog (or is he God?) lies down with him. His last sight is the Ajirah plane flying over him to safety and then he closes his eyes. Paralleled how it all began - the perfect end.

Alternaverse – Why Oh Why Didn’t I Take the Blue Pill?

Jin and Sun are waiting in the hospital for….Juliet! She shows them that their baby is ok and FLASH they remember their Island life and I get all weepy. Also they now know English. Juliet leaves the room thinking she’s the best f@#king doctor in the world for not only finding the baby but somehow teaching them English in the process. Then she runs into her ex-husband Jack. Not really a big surprise there we were all suspecting it. He gives her tickets to the big concert for their son and new aunt Claire and then he’s off to fix John Locke’s legs.

Sawyer, having been sent to watch over the Kwons, gets to the hospital only to find that they don’t need him. Confused he goes to get an Apollo bar but it gets stuck. Those things NEVER come down on the first try. Juliet shows up to help him and FLASH they both remember their island selves and we find out why Juliet, when she died in the 1st episode this season, was talking about getting coffee together.
Post surgery Jack visits Locke and finds him surprisingly resilient to painkillers. Not only that but he can already move his toes. FLASH! Locke remembers his Island life and he’s back to the fantastic John Locke we all knew and loved. Jack half flashes but stubborn old Jack Sheppard isn’t going to remember things so easily and he leaves.

Hurley makes a brief side trip to pop Charlie with a tranquilizer and then takes Sayid to a bar just in time to see Boone get his ass kicked and Shannon get slapped. What fun! Sayid springs into action and rescues her. FLASH! He remembers his Island life. So does Shannon. Boone already did apparently based on his comments to Hurley. Who would have thought the love of Sayid’s life was really Shannon? The only women more annoying than Kate.

Meanwhile at Widemore’s Concert for the Cure (or something) Daniel starts playing with Drive Shaft and, to be honest, it’s f@#king terrible. Charlie spots Claire in the audience and is smitten. Claire spots Charlie and…goes into labor. Don’t worry Charlie I have that affect on women too. Claire goes backstage followed by Kate and Charlie (who walks off mid set apparently. Guess the bassist isn’t that important). Claire pops out Aaron and FLASH FLASH FLASH all 3 of them remember their Island lives.

Everyone meets up at the church where Jack’s dad’s body was left at the beginning of the episode. Outside the church Ben asks Locke for forgiveness which he grants and Ben thankfully accepts. He then tells Locke he doesn’t need that wheelchair and wouldn’t you know; only hours after surgery, Locke stands up and gives us one of those big Locke grins. Hurley comes out to ask Ben if he was coming inside but Ben declines saying he as a few more things to work out. Hurley says he was a great #2 and Ben says he was a great #1 (alluding to their reign as Protectors of the Island!) then Hurley goes inside.

Kate tracks down Jack at the post-concert and takes him to the church. Jack goes to his father’s coffin and upon touching gets a FLASH. Is he ready to believe? He opens it and….nothing is inside! Behind him his father speaks. How are you here dad you’re dead? How are you here son? I’m dead. BWOANG! FLASH! Everyone in the alternaverse is dead! Yes the alternaverse is a way station the Losties created so they can all meet up before heading on to the next stage of existence. Cue big reunion party complete with banner in the back that says Oceanic 815 Crash of 2004. Christian opens the doors in the back of the church and a bright light fills the screen. The end.

Theoryland (although are they really theories? Maybe more like Explainationland)

- Why’d Desmond pull the cork if it was going to destroy the Island? Cause the magic gold pool was what made Evil Locke immortal. Without it he was made killable but at the same time the Island couldn’t exist without it so it became unstable. So both Jack and Evil Locke won when Desmond pulled it out.

- So did all the events on the Island happen or did they all die in the crash? ALL THE EVENTS ON THE ISLAND WERE REAL! Christian says so himself but for some reason (perhaps due to the shots of the plane crash they showed during the credits) people keep saying “OMG they died in the crash!”. You want more proof? Hurley and Ben’s conversation about being a great team alludes to all the work they did on the Island after Jack put the cork back in. The alternaverse was where all the Losties went after they died. They didn’t all die at once though – some died before Jack and some long after. Since time doesn’t exist in the alternaverse though it seemed like they all arrived there at the same time. So immediately after Jack died in the bamboo forest he woke up in the alternaverse on Oceanic 815. Kate meanwhile escaped the Island and lived out her life and maybe died of old age. At which point she woke up on Oceanic 815 at the same “time” as Jack.

- What about the people in the alternaverse who didn’t go into the church – Ben, Danielle, Alex, Faraday, Faraday’s mother, Widmore, Charlotte, Miles, Ana Lucia, ect. They weren’t ready to progress yet. Some people believe that that meant they still had issues to work out but I don’t agree. I think they weren’t ready to leave because they had all they wanted in the alternaverse and had no reason to leave. Ben had a relationship with Alex again (and the chance to get with Danielle if I’m reading her after dinner flirting correctly). Faraday had a chance to finally get with Charlotte. Faraday’s mom finally got to have time with her son in a place where she wasn’t doomed to kill him. Miles had a relationship with his dad Dr. Changtastic. Ana Lucia, um, she kinda seemed like she got worse. Crooked cop much? Fisher Stevens…just got his script for Short Circuit 3 green lit!

- What about people who didn’t even show up in the alternaverse? Michael, Walt, and Frank? Michael we know was trapped on the Island fated to be a whisper for quite some time although I like to think Protector Hurley eventually freed him of that. Walt had much more of a life off the Island than on the Island. He didn’t have a need for the alternaverse way station. Frank? Honestly I don’t know why Frank was left out. Maybe cause of all the havoc he caused when he was the Lawnmower Man?

- What about Jack’s kid Daniel? In the words of an awoken John Locke “You don’t have a son!”. Daniel was a figment of the alternaverse who’s only purpose was to give Jack perspective on his relationship with his father. Same for all the other extras in the alternaverse. Figments!

- So the alternaverse was purgatory? I don’t think it was purgatory. Purgatory is where you go when your sins aren’t so bad you go directly to hell but bad enough that you have get wait listed for heaven. The alternaverse was more like the loadup room in the Matrix. Everyone met there before going on to heaven/afterlife/whatever you call it. They had already atoned for whatever misdeeds they did they just had such a bond forged on the Island that they wanted to continue to the next life together. Thus they made the alternaverse.

- So the bomb last season did nothing? No, it was what saved the rest of Dharma from the Incident. Without the bomb going off then the electromagnetic energy would have continued to pull down anything and everything metal. It didn’t create a new timeline it played out exactly how it was supposed to play out. In the aftermath the Losties were brought back to their original time.

- So why was the Island in the bottom of the ocean in the alternaverse? The alternaverse represented a place where the Island couldn’t bring the Losties back thus it was at the bottom of the ocean unable to do anything to them.

And so ends LOST. What did you think about the finale? Reactions? Thoughts? Theories? And what mysteries were you disappointed they didn’t solve? In the following weeks I’ll make up best guess answers for them so you can have a little closure.

Blog Update

Sorry folks been really busy this week and haven't been able to organize my thoughts on the finale yet. My quick reaction: the Island end was perfect but I was initially undecided on the sideways end. The more I think about it thought the more I like it so that's good.

I think people's opinion of the finale will be determined on whether they wanted character or mythology closure. If you wanted character closure then you loved the finale. If you wanted more answers on the mythology, of which none was covered with the finale, then you're a little mad.

I was initially drawn to LOST because of all the mysteries but I've grown to really enjoy the characters. Because I enjoyed the characters so much the finale sat well with me. My only complaint would have to be that there will never be any more episodes of LOST again. I guess I'll have to comfort myself with self written Ben & Hurley fanfictions.

Full blog will be available sometime this week. Hopefully.

Why They Died

Can it be? Only 1 episode left of LOST for forever?! I guess I’m a week away from writing LOST fanfiction rather than this blog!

Alternaverse – I Love It When A Plan Comes Together

Jack wakes up and the mystery cut on his neck is larger than it was in the 1st episode of the season. Island Jack doesn’t seem to have the same cut on his neck so what is causing it? Is AlternaJack getting some universe bleed through from future Island Jack? Jack, on island, in the alternate universe, but in the future? Only when dealing with LOST could I write a sentence like that and it not seem too crazy. Maybe Evil Locke will try and slice his neck open in the finale? Anyways, Jack enjoys a gourmet breakfast (Super Oat Bran! Ask for it at your local grocer!) with his son and new half sister then he gets a call – his father’s body has been found!

Only that call was not from Oceanic it was from Man In The Know, Desmond. He’s back at Locke’s school and got his sights set on him and his arrogant wheel chair having ass. But not so fast! Dr. Ben is here to save the day! Only not so much. Desmond beats him so hard he sees Desmond kicking his ass in another universe. Yet Ben is left feeling strangely as peace and he tells Locke that Desmond was there to open his mind up not commit vehicular homicide!

Fresh off his Ben beating Desmond promptly turns himself in to the Detective Sawyer and soon he finds himself with Murderin’ Sayid and Cell Block Kate. Everything’s going according to plan he chuckles to himself.

Meanwhile Locke has given into the machinations of fate and taken Jack up on his offer to fix him. He is finally ready to get out of that wheel chair. Huzzah! Old Locke, Man of Faith, is starting to come back! What will it mean for Evil Locke?

Back at the prison Desmond, Murderin’ Sayid, and Cell Block Kate are going to be moved to county. Calmly Desmond explains to them that they are going to get free and that they are going to have to do something for him. “He’s crazy, just nod” thinks Kate while all Sayid can hear are the voices telling him to kill, kill, kill. Suddenly the van stops and Ana Lucia lets them out. Hurley shows up in his big yellow Hurleymobile and pays her off. Hurley is fully aware of his Island self now, “Oh cool Ana Lucia’s here, is she coming with us?” “No, she’s not ready”. Desmond sends Sayid off with Hurley to a mystery location (to get Sawyer perhaps…) and he and Kate head to the concert where we already know Jack, David, Claire, Charlie, Miles, Dr. Changtastic, Charlotte, Daniel, Penny, Widmore, and Eloise are going to be at. How do I know all this? Because it’s the Drive Shaft concert baby! Desmond pulls on his fingerless gloves, lights up a cigar, and makes like Hannibal from the A-Team – I love it when a plan comes together.

On Island – I Choose You Pikachu

Jack, Kate, Sawyer, and Hurley are left filled with sorrow and hate for Evil Locke. They’ve got to kill him they just don’t know how. Desmond is the key Jack says and they’re off! Enroute Lil’ Jacob shows up and demands Hurley give him his ashes and then he bolts. Surprisingly Hurley catches up with him and Lil’ Jacob has grown up to regular Jacob. The rest of the gang shows up and surprisingly they can see Jacob too. Then we GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING ANSWERS!

Jacob brought them all to the Island to fix this mistake he made thousands of years ago by tossing his brother into the magic cave. Not only that but they were picked cause they all had pretty shitty lives. The Island needed them but they needed the Island. I would say he’s pretty spot on with that. While their lives aren’t the greatest; the Island certainly has made them better people. Now one of them has to take over as Protector and it has to be willingly; not like what his mother did to him. Although he is kinda railroading them by saying bad things will happen if nobody does. Jack, completing his transformation from a man of science to a man of faith (or perhaps a hybrid of both), says he’ll do it.

Jacob takes him to a stream, utters some Latin, and has him drink. Bam – he’s been Protector’d! Was it just me or was there was a look in Jack’s eyes of a rush knowledge hitting him? Now he’s off to the magic cave to protect it. A cave which apparently was very close to where he was originally spat out onto the Island. Does that mean he was intended to be the Protector all along?

On Island – My Glock Goes Pop, Pop, Pop

We finally get back to the adventures of Miles, Ben, and Richard. They just reached Dharmaville. Miles walks over Alex’s grave and hears something strange but we aren’t privy to it (could be important?) and then we are in Ben’s secret room o’ suits and C4. Just then they hear a rustling in the kitchen. Apparently Zoe was hungry for a snack. Then Widmore joins them and Ben gets really agitated.

They posture a little and then Zoe reports that Evil Locke is here. Ben gives them a place to hide and he and Richard go out to meet him. Miles runs. Fast. Where to Miles? Richard, still convinced Evil Locke wants him on his team, confidently strides along the grass only to get clobbered by Black Smoke. Ben just calmly sits on his porch sipping a mint julep. Is Richard dead? I hope not cause he deserves a little better death than that. Deaths like that are reserved for nameless Others and mercenaries not Ricardus!

Evil Locke recruits Ben to do his killing and then Ben rats out Widmore. Regardless of how things went down in the secret room I still think Widmore was on Black Shirt’s team all along. Sure he gets blasted by Ben but I think that’s because Ben was acting as a wildcard finally taking his revenge on Widmore. Whatever he whispered to Evil Locke proved that he was in cahoots I just wish I knew what was said.

Anyways so Ben says he’s ready to go kill the next victims and Evil Locke says he’s going to destroy the Island which kinda doesn’t work for that whole promise he made to Ben to give him the Island if he helped him. Also Desmond has mysteriously gotten out of the well. Who got him out? Miles? A waterlogged Frank???
Theoryland

To be honest I don’t have a clue as to how this is all going to end so I only have a couple theories this week.

- Desmond turned the Hatch fail safe key and now he has become the Island fail safe key. Either Evil Locke wants to throw him into the magic cave to destroy the Island or Evil Locke will start the process of destroying the Island and Desmond will have to sacrifice himself again by throwing himself into the magic cave to stop it.

- Alternaverse is all going to come to a head at the Widmore’s party featuring Drive Shaft.

- Super out there theory – Jack is going to get his throat sliced on the Island. Maybe he’ll even die and somebody else will have to become the Protector.

- Even more out there? Series ends with Evil Locke destroying the Island. That’s why it is sunk in the alternaverse.

Across the Sea

While this episode didn’t really move forward the plot of LOST as it pertains to us it did key us in on several mythologies of the Island. Rather than recap it I’m just going to cover the interesting stuff we learned:

- Jacob and Black Shirt are twin brothers raised by an Other Mother who was the Protector of the Island before Jacob. How long she’s been there is anyone’s guess but it’s been long enough for her to go more than a little crazy. She hates people. Hate, hate, hates them. Her job? To keep people away from the golden cave. Almost as important as that job is her belief that she cannot let her 2 boys interact with people or get off the Island and be subjected to their evils. Up until they saw the people there was a certain Garden of Eden like innocence in Jacob and Black Shirt. “What is lying”, “What does dying mean?”, ect.

- So we now know what the Island is – the spiritual center of the world. Somewhere on that Island is a golden cave that represents life, death, and rebirth. It is that cave that the Island Protector is responsible for protecting and apparently it is hidden such that only the Protector can find it although people can dig through the Island and find it based off the electromagnetic energy it puts off.

- Black Shirt, with his innate super power of knowing how things work, was the mind behind the Frozen Donkey Wheel and it’s attachment to the Island’s core.

- The origin of the Black Smoke! The golden cave killed Black Shirt’s mortal body but freed his immortal soul into the black smoke. The mechanics behind how he forms into other bodies is still a mystery but at least we know why he can do that and Jacob can’t. There is a possibility that Black Shirt actually died and Black Smoke is some ancient evil released when he was tossed in the cave but Evil Locke seems to know what Black Shirt would know so I’m discounting that theory for now.

- Adam and Eve were NOT Emilia Earhart and her co-pilot they were Other Mother and Black Shirt’s discarded body. And the stones were from Lil’ Black Shirt’s game.

- Has Jacob been Protector for so long that he’s gotten a little of the crazy from his Other Mother? The job definitely could get a little tiresome after a couple thousand years doing it.

- Theory expansion! Last week I said Widmore and Black Shirt were in cahoots. Now we know what Widmore gets! The golden cave! He represents the personification of exactly what Other Mother feared from people.

- We still don’t know why Black Shirt can’t get off the Island but Jacob can. Is that a benefit of being the Protector?
Two more episodes left! Sadness!!

The Candidate

End game is in full effect and now nobody’s safe! Anyone could die at any second? Oh shit! Did Hurley just die while I wrote this? No, no he didn’t. But he could have.

Alternaverse – “I’ll Fix You”, Coldplay Must Be LOST Fans

The action picks up with a post-surgery Locke and a beaming Jack:
“Dude, I totally saved your life” says Jack.
“Thanks, bro” responds Locke.
“That’s not the best part man – I can totally fix your legs. You’re going to walk again mother f#%ker!”.
“No thanks.”
“Wha!??!”

Turns out alterna-Locke got his pilot’s license, convinced his plane hating dad to accompany him on his first flight, and then totally crashed it paralyzing him and turning Anthony Cooper into a vegetable. If only Locke knew about his dad’s con man past maybe he wouldn’t be punishing himself with his paralysis and he’d take Jack up on the offer.

Before Locke actually tells Jack about the accident he turns to Locke’s dentist Bernard to get some answers. Bernard directs him to Cooper and almost seems like he knows what’s going on as he does it. “Of course I remember a guy from 4 years ago Jack”. Strange…you’re up to something Bernard.

Jack also gets a visit from sister Claire and her music box. You know who else had a music box? The Crazy French Danielle who Island Claire has taken the place of on the Island.

Outside of finding out about alterna-Locke the purpose of this flash sideways to get Jack thinking about the fact that everyone he’s meeting these days was on flight 815. Locke, Bernard, Claire, Desmond, the pizza guy from last night, that cat that he almost ran over. All of them were on Oceanic 815! Oh yes Jack it most definitely means something.

On Island – If I Can Blow Up That Sub Then All The Rest of the Dominoes Will Fall Like A House of Cards…Checkmate!

Back in the real world everyone is stuck into the old bear cages at the Hydra Station (man, I need to get a bear cage – those things are SO useful!). They’re hopelessly trapped! Oh wait, here comes Smokie and Jack and now they’re free again. Nice job Widmore! Now off to the plane and sweet freedom.

Not so fast it seems! Widmore wired the plane to explode but thankfully Evil Locke spotted the exposed wires and took out a bunch of C4. Still there could be more so our heroes head to their new ticket off the Island, the sub.

They find the sub surprisingly unguarded and get in with ease. Jack wishes them well but he’s staying here. Evil Locke asks him why he wants to stay and he says because somebody told him to. Who asks Evil Locke. “Your face!” shouts Jack and he pushes him into the water. Then all hell breaks out as Widmore’s men open fire from the shore. Kate is hit! Unfortunately it doesn’t seem fatal. Everyone, minus Claire and a water logged Evil Locke, make it into the sub and hasten away.

Jack goes into his trusty backpack for something to stop Kate’s bleeding and finds…the plane bomb! I totally saw Evil Locke switch his backpack before they went after the sub. Yes, it seems they’ve all fallen for Evil Locke’s clever plan!
Cool your jets Jack says cause he’s got Evil Locke’s whole plan figured out. Evil Locke needs them dead but he can’t kill them himself so he’s arranged this little sub bomb. But the bomb won’t do it alone – he needs them to try and defuse it at which point he isn’t actively killing them they’re killing themselves. Sawyer, not around for Jack’s dynamite stare down, isn’t buying it and pulls the wires. Not surprisingly the bomb goes into super fast mode. Sayid, in a final act of redemption, grabs the bomb and dashes to the far reaches of the sub. Not before telling Jack about Desmond; who’s still alive in the well.

The explosion vaporizes Sayid, seems to kill Frank with a hatch door, and pins Sun behind a bunch of metal crap. Kate is passed out from the gun shot and, of course, the sub is sinking. Hurley and Kate head to the surface (fat floats!) and Jack, Sawyer, and Jin try and free Sun but they can’t. Sawyer gets nailed by some debris and he’s out for the count too. Jack leaves with Sawyer after Jin tells him to go. Jin and Sun, finally reunited only an episode ago, die holding each others hands in a moment that I was glad my girlfriend was in Orlando for cause she might have seen me mist up a bit.

On the beach the survivors are left with the tragedy they just went through and break down. Back at the docks Evil Locke sets out to finish the job with Crazy Claire in tow.

Theoryland

- Bernard seems to know something of the other world. Has he touched his On Island self? Is he some sort of omnipotent demigod watching the whole thing play out? He has a knowledge greater than his character to this point should have. Why!?

- I’m calling it right now – Evil Locke and Widmore are in cahoots! All of Widmore’s actions on the Island have been to set up Evil Locke’s master plan which was to blow them all up in the sub. Evil Locke wouldn’t have had the C4 unless Widmore left it for him. And don’t you think that if the Candidates were really important to him he would have guarded them with more than the slightly chubby guy and a rifle? In fact all of Widmore’s “important” things are only half assed guarded. Desmond? Easily captured by Sayid. Their generators? Easily taken out of Sayid. The plane? Easily taken over by Evil Locke. Yes it’s all been one big con. Evil Locke gets his freedom from the Island and Widmore gets the Island’s all important electromagnetic pockets and all the scientific wealth they represent. The person Jacob needed brought to the Island was not Charles Widmore it was Desmond Hume!

- Does the fact that Alterna-Locke have his pilot’s license mean that somehow his conscious will integrate into either his dead body resurrecting him or displacing Black Smoke from his Evil Locke body and then be the pilot that flies everyone to away in the Ajira plane? All this time I thought Frank was going to do it but it seems his continued presence was a red herring since he is now dead (potentially).

- Will Jack pushing Evil Locke in the water have any effect on him? We know Evil Locke can’t just black smoke it over water which says to me he has some vulnerability to it. Perhaps now that he got wet he can’t turn into Black Smoke anymore?

- What is Team Richard up to? Man I hope they’ve grabbed Locke’s body and are going to resurrect him somehow.

- Now that the Candidates are wise to Evil Locke’s treachery how will he kill the rest of them?

The Last Recruit

Looks like we got another set up episode this week. Not quite as crazy as the last couple of weeks but still some interesting things happening.

Alternaverse – Fly Together, Die Alone?

Everyone was getting together in the Alternaverse this episode. Locke and Ben head to the hospital only to meet up with Jin and Sun while Desmond delicately pushes Claire into meeting her half brother Jack (as well as previously blown up Illenya) just before Jack is called to the very same hospital Locke, Ben, Sun, and Jin are at. Meanwhile Sawyer and Miles chill with Kate and then go apprehend Sayid. The only one missing from a fully fledged Oceanic get together was Hurley. Most likely because he was too busy getting’ it on with Libby.

On Island – What’s With All The Explosions?

Jack and Evil Locke have a little side conversation (lots of these side chats happening here…) and we find out that Evil Locke was in fact the Christian Sheppard people were seeing around the Island. And just like that another LOST mystery is solved. Why did he lead Jack to the caves and water? Cause he wanted to help. How nice!

Magically it is day again and Not-Tina Fey shows up and tells Locke to give her back Desmond. Then she has her people drop a mortar on his camp. Badass Evil Locke doesn’t even flinch when the shell goes boom. He has till the end of the day which given that we just went from night to day in like a second could mean he could have hours or seconds. Crazy Island.

The impending shelling makes Evil Locke move up his plans and he sends Sawyer and Kate to fetch his sweet sailboat, “Monkey Business”, while he takes the rest of the folks by land. “Large groups move slow” he says but his eyes say “plot device”. Sawyer, putting all his chips on this submarine hijacking scheme (and really who in their life hasn’t done the same?), side chats with Jack and tells him to double back and bring all his Oceanic buddies (minus Crazy Claire and Zombie Sayid) to a special beach where he’ll pick them up in the boat and then they’ll steal the sub and sail away to freedom. Evil Locke then has yet another side chat with Sayid telling him to go kill Desmond. The groups split.

Locke, worried about Sayid, goes back to look for him giving Jack & crew the perfect chance to escape. Unfortunately he abandons Claire. His half sister and girl he just had a 10 minute talk with about how everyone abandoned her on the Island…
Sayid is all totally read to kill a very serene Desmond until Desmond asks him what he’ll tell Nadia he did to bring her back. Apparently killing Dogen and John Lennon and a couple of Widmore dudes is cool but maybe Nadia might draw the line at killing a dude stuck in a well. Does he kill him? Does he not kill him? We don’t know but he tells Locke that he did.

True to his word Sawyer picks everyone up but ut-oh what is this? Abandoned Claire. Perhaps angry about being abandoned? Kate talks her down and their merry band grows by one but not before Claire ominously warns that Evil Locke will not be happy they left. You should have just shot Kate Claire.

As the Monkey Business sails across the water Jack looks pensively out at the ocean. He’s been doing a lot of that this season. Maybe since Evil Locke wants them to leave so bad maybe they should in fact NOT leave he reasons. Sawyer misunderstands him and thinks he said something anti-submarine and kicks him off the boat. A couple mile swim later Jack is back on the Island and at the feet of Locke. Just in time for the shelling of a life time courtesy of one Charles Elizabeth Widmore who, after a touching Jin/Sun reunion, altered the deal. Sawyer, pray that he doesn’t alter it any further or you could end up in carbonite buddy!
We end the episode with Locke telling Jack he’ll be alright, he’s with him now. And thus Jack becomes the titular character of this episode – The Last Recruit. Not to be confused with Bruce Willis, who was of course The Last Boy Scout.

Theoryland

- So my theory about Christian Sheppard being brought to life by the Man in Black and being a zombie henchman like Sayid proved to be false. He apparently was Christian the entire time. At least on the Island. Who was Christian off Island then!? Smokie can’t get off the Island! Evil Locke is lying, he wasn’t him! He resurrected him I tells ya! I refuse to let my theory die! If he was Christian than why is he stuck in Locke’s body and not Christians?

- Maybe Sayid isn’t irredeemable after all. Looks like Desmond got him thinking about something other than murderin’ people. And that saved his life. The question is…did he also get Sayid thinking about pulling poor Aussies out of wells?

- We’re right on track for Jack to fix Locke’s paralysis in the alternaverse. Bank on it.

- Speaking of alternaverse Locke – in the ambulance when he said “Helen, she’s the woman I was going to marry”. Did he say that cause he thought he was going to die before he could marry her or did he say that because he had tapped into his Island self. A self who was going to marry Helen but ended up alienating her with his crazy daddy obsession. I’m thinking he’s tapped in.

- Also what about Sun seeing him in the stretcher next to her say “It’s him!”. She’s also tapped in thanks to the bullet she took.

- I think if you’re a Candidate you have a certain immunity to Evil Locke’s voice. Yes, Sayid and Claire fell for it but none of the rest of the Candidates seem to be irrevocably tied to him. I don’t think we have to worry about Jack now that he’s the only Candidate left on the Island. In fact I believe Jack is going to step into the Jacob role – going full circle from Man of Science to Man of Faith. Additionally him taking the Jacob role will imprison Evil Locke on the Island once again. A certain poetic ending: Jack and Locke forever trapped on the Island battling against each other much like Jack and the real Locke were for most of the series.

- At some point Frank is going to fly that plane off the Island. That’s the only reason he’s been kept around. What we should wonder about is who will be on that plane when it takes off. I just said Jack won’t be there. Who else?

- Who the flip is David’s mother? Most people are probably saying Juliet but you know who I say? Nikki! Wouldn’t that be a kick to the nuts 

- I think the massive Oceanic reunion is going to happen at the hospital but what is going to bring Sawyer, Miles, Kate, and Sayid there? How will Desmond do it? There’s only so many problems you can solve by running your car into them…

Prepare for Mindblowing of the Highest Degree

I give you ALL OF THE WHISPERS transcribed.